By Elton Brawn►
After several years of publicly touting his supposed "genius IQ," President Donald Trump has finally submitted to taking a standardized intelligence test. Last week, President Trump sat down with psychologist Gabriella Lopez, who administered the Wechsler Adult Intelligence Scale (WAIS).
The results were unexpected.
According to Dr. Lopez, President Trump brought his tax returns to the testing appointment. These are the same tax returns that the president refused to publicly release several years ago, causing controversy. According to Dr. Lopez, Donald Trump believed that one's IQ score was calculated by looking at net worth.
"He didn't understand that a test was involved," she said, "and he used the term 'income quotient' more than once."
When Dr. Lopez explained that intelligence was measured by cognitive problem-solving ability, President Trump reportedly counter-explained that "smart people have money because they’re winners." He then went on to explain to her, for the better part of an hour, that he’s a genius who has "lots and lots of money."
"At one point," Dr. Lopez added, "he removed his wallet and began throwing hundred-dollar bills on the test itself."
As Trump refused to answer a single question on the WAIS, his results were uninterpretable. The president’s IQ remains unknown, though Dr. Lopez speculated that his inability to understand the difference between the phenomena of "thinking" and "having money" would suggest, in her words, "substantial cognitive deficits."
When President Trump heard about Dr. Lopez’s speculation, he tweeted "she’s an illegal" and "the test is fake, create [sic] by Democrats."
***
Image attribution: Krzysztof Sitkowski / CC BY-SA (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0)
