Alex Jones' IQ is 9

 By Stephen Kunk ►

Austin, TX (AP) - A leak from the records division of L.C. Anderson High School in Austin, Texas, has revealed that Alex Jones, the founder of conspiracist website InfoWars and host of the infamous self-titled radio show, has an IQ of 9.

According to the leaked documents, the teenaged Jones scored in the single-digits on the Stanford-Binet Intelligence Scales (third edition), a popular test of cognitive ability at the time. Statistically speaking, this places Jones more than 5 standard deviations below the population mean, meaning his intelligence is grossly impaired relative to that of the average person. 

In order to characterize this kind of cognitive deficiency, psychologist Henry H. Goddard grouped people with especially low IQ scores into subcategories. These included "morons", who had IQs of 51–70, "imbeciles," who scored 26-50, and "idiots," who scored 0-25.
Alex Jones,
courtesy Travis County Sheriff's Office


Given his score of 9, Alex Jones is, technically speaking, an idiot. Still, Jones' idiocy has not precluded him from establishing a massively popular radio show and website, in the process cementing himself as one of the most trusted and representative voices in American conservativism
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It's hard to fathom that a man who espoused that autism is caused by vaccines, that Hurricane Katrina was geo-engineered via weather weapons, that the Sandy Hook mass shooting was a false flag perpetrated by gun control advocates, and that "estrogen mimickers" in water bottles are part of a government operation to turn people gay, has serious intellectual impairments.

"Alex Jones is a testament to the adaptivity of the brain and the irrepressible spirit of America," offered Andreas Nabovsky, a neuroscientist at Florida Pacific University. "A staggering proportion of the American populace see this certifiable idiot as the pinnacle of intellectual achievement. It's amazing how someone with such low brain function can inspire so many Americans."

Accompanying documents indicate that Jones took the Stanford-Binet test multiple times, with 9 marking his highest score. Apparently, the teenaged Jones sought valiantly to break double-digits, but to no avail.

Jones responded to the news by promptly scheduling another sitting for a more up-to-date intelligence test. According to test administrators at Sound Mind Psychology in Austin, Jones ripped up the exam paper at the fifteen-minute mark and then ate the shreds.

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Stephen Kunk lives with his wife and two daughters on the Pacific coast of the United States.